the weekly bird
Boomers Shorts is Now BirddogsHow a man with a feminine urine stream stole Boomers
Boomers is no more. It was stolen, by a man with a weak stream.
We can't use Boomers anymore.
Why? Tom Fath. He has a Canadian Trademark reserving the name as an alternate for his Canadian Minor League Soccer team. He has threatened to sue if we don't burn the shorts.
Not to worry, we will soar with Birddogs.
Directly from the oversized brow of Mr. Tom Fath.
But first, a tribute to Mr. Tom Fath.
You can spot Tom by his trademark eyebrows.
It's like he reached a promotional agreement with Nike for the use of his face.
During the week, this is how Tom opens cereal at the office.
On Saturdays, Tom works his way down to the soccer fields to point and laugh at fat kids.
On Sundays, Tom enjoys circling ants.
Contrary to reports, Tom does not "Call in Captain Skully" to "seal the deal" with star players.
This type of talk just undermines the integrity of the Canadian Minor League Soccer game.
Tom Fath's personal flagstaff is average in size.
Not small by any means, but definitely not big.
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