the weekly bird
5 Misses That Kept Me A Virgin Until I Was 23.
Miss #1: We were in the backseat removing our clothes when I accidentally kicked the shift lever and sent the car rolling down the hill.
Miss #2: Did a split on the dance floor at Senior Prom.
Miss #3: Was watching a movie at her place and got the tum rums. I clogged and flooded her toilet.
Miss #4: Was driving to her place when I got a text that half the football team was tipping cows.
Miss #5: Was deep into some heavy petting in her basement, but her punk brother said he wouldn't leave until he finished the complete Lord of the Rings Trilogy.
It's Snowing Steve Irwin (RIP). Put On Some Pants and Stay Alive.
Call For Dick Hertz and Other Pranks We Regret From Childhood.
Why Aren’t BBQs Called Meat-N-Greets and Other Word Improvements.
Office Poll: What's Your Spirit Animal?
Negotiating Tactics for Guys Who Use the Word Mufflebags.