the weekly bird
Gym Shorts For Guys Who Chase Whales.
Ahab's thirst is insatiable. He once got arrested for stealing plus-size mannequins from JC Penny.
The man refuses to use anything less than a No. 5 pencil because a No. 2 is just sickeningly thin.
Ahab spits out white wine because anything less than a full-bodied red is disgusting.
Ahab joined Greenpeace not to protest whale hunting, but to get first crack at fresh blubber.
Ben and Jerry's "Chunky Monkey" is a semi-autobiographical ice cream named after Captain Ahab.
The avocado smashing, guac-banging, hair-wiffing innovation that makes Birddogs so damn comfortable
How To Maximize Your Carbon Footprint
69 Jokes We Made Wearing Birddogs Pants
We asked for honest feedback. And some of you were extremely childish.
It's easy to make fake news: here are our viral winners