How to Avoid a Fight Without Looking Like a Pussy

6 Tactics to retreat gracefully when you've crossed the line. 
Tactic #1: Make it clear you have no honor.
In great detail, let him know you are singularly focused on inflicting damage to his genitals.
Tactic #2: Hit your buddy.
Open hand slap your friend whose parents aren't married.
It's easier to patch it up if you have an existing relationship.
Tactic #3: Spread culpability to your friends.
Tactic #4: Feign homosexuality.
Tactic #5: You've always got biology in your corner .
Tactic #6: Leverage Federal Statutes.
Want to avoid conflict in style?
The Lollygags just hit the warehouse.
Or if ripping harpoons into seafaring mammals is more your style, check out the Captain Ahabs.