How to Get Hard at Home: A Birddogs Exercise Plan.

Stallone drank raw eggs in Rocky and now he can barely talk.
Always cook your eggs thoroughly, can't stress that enough.
In a time pinch? Try bulimia.
Bulimia got a bad rap from nutritionists and MSNBC.
Never stretch.
It's a hoax. You wouldn't take a bath before jumping in the pool would you?
Constantly Clench Cheeks (C³) ®
Just always be clenching.
Standing at your desk to stay slim?
Waste of time, only security guards and sex workers need to stand to make a living.