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Four New Wives Tales You Have Never Heard About.

They gotta start somewhere.
Accidentally spilling salt
#1: If your shoelaces come untied, your girlfriend is cheating on you.
Shoelaces are untied? Girlfriend is definitely cheating.
#2: They call 'em "old wives tales" because women grow tails as they get older. Ever seen grandma naked? No? How do you know she doesnt have one?
#3: Girls who use T-Mobile are more likely to give hand jobs.
Girls that use t-mobile are more likely to pleasure you.
#4: It is 7 months bad luck if you make eye contact with a woman's nipple ring.
Shielding his eyes from potential nipple rings
You guys are slurping down pants faster than we can make them.
Seattle Pounders birddogs pants