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THE LEGEND OF STAFF SERGEANT TED DUNGEE

A True Patriot Who Hazed Our Boys To Become American Fighting Machines.
sstd salute
S.S. TD Legend #1:
Sarge told me he was gonna poop in a box then mail it to my parents.
When I asked why he said:
sstd pos
S.S. TD Legend #2:
Sergeant Dungee hates fat recruits.
He blames them for breathing too much of his oxygen and clogging his pipes with their jumbo dumps.
over the stall
S.S. TD Legend #3:
After a failed inspection, Sergeant Dungee made me clean his car with my toothbrush and brush my teeth after.
I got severely ill but I learned a valuable lesson, thanks Sarge.
brushing toilet
S.S. TD Legend #4:
Sarge told me only steers and queers came from my hometown.
He then proved it with a racy photo of some gay cows.
two bovines
S.S. TD Legend #5:
Instead of "bed inspections", SS Ted Dungee would give us "Ted inspections".
"Ted inspections" consisted of the Sargent sitting on our faces until we passed out.
bed inspections
S.S. TD Legend #6:
After missing some rounds downrange, Sarge made me punch myself in the face.
I deserved it though for being born with a lazy eye.
lazy eye

Jokes written for us. But you're welcome to read.